Sightseeing - Perth

Well, on the long weekend, we embraced the tourists in us and finally visited the Perth Bell Tower, or Swan Bells as its also known by....







It was a gorgeous spring day, so although I must admit Id usually rather be at home sucking back a G&T while watching B&theB, it was pretty ok ;)



Oh- the attitude of LMC at 4 years going on 14!

See! Im baaaaack

Well, things have been going swimmingly. I am also a pathological liar, so take from that what you will! I have been doing alot of soul searching the past few months, and not any of it has been fun, or heart warming, or warm-fuzzy ish.

I am not a good mother. But, I make it for it in love. I will always be there for my kids, be a hand to hold, to be a shoulder to cry on, to be open ears when they need it, and to be their biggest fan. I will support whomever they choose to be, and whomever they choose to love [with exceptions there. I will invest in a shotgun when all else fails]

See, my role model wasn't the greatest. I was never shown alot of love, so I try to make up for it with my kids. I tell them I love them many times each day, and shower them in hugs and kisses while they will still let me. I try to be firm [but not very good at it] Kids need boundaries, and its up to us to show them how, sometimes we assume they should just 'know', but they don't.

I have taken Miss 4 to a child psychologist who actually said LML is actually normal [oh what a relief that was], however, she is still quite teary, more so than what I feel other 4 year olds are. She is still not doing well with toilet training, which is a concern as she will be at school next year.



Here is my girl on her 4th birthday on the carousel at the Perth Zoo

apologies for the long time no see!

Gosh! Time has flown! The department stores are determined to send us insane by arranging all things christmas in the front of store displays, and I have been plodding along. [I would say nicely, but Ill leave that up to you to decide!]

I really should change this blog to 'not so bad mum trying very hard despite suffering mental illnesses, one of which is borderline personality disorder'
I am a newly diagnosee [yes, I like to make up words] and while I am not struggling with the diagnosis [I was when Bi Polar was thrown around], I am struggling with maintaining a certain 'behaviour' on the very lacklustre anti depressants I have been given.

My psychiatrist has me on Cymbalta 60mg, which I dislike as they have done nothing for my depression, and obviously nothing for the BPD. They do, however, cause insomnia and crazy dreams, and are just NOT for me.

Right, poor loyal but neglected followers, I WILL be back! With photos as a sweetener!! My precious angels have been up to a lot in the last six months [birthdays etc]

**DISASTER ZONE***

Well, week one of no medication is over...

I would love to report that I have been taking it easy and everything is ok....

It's been a bloody crap-house week, and some of it was out of my control.

My best friend just walked out on her hubby and kids- I didn't realise that would affect me so, lots of crying and moments of anger etc...

I'm planning [again] on pulling Miss 4 out of kindy, arguing with the school psych to hold her back a year, and see a separate child psychologist- it has dawned on me she suffers anxiety- which is better than the autism spectrum I was imagining I suppose!!

Every electrical appliance I have seems to have chosen this week to give up the ghost [car is still a lemon =(]
Laptop is about to go flying through the window.. Dishwasher- I mean seriously- what mum can live without a functional dishwasher?? Ours is a 3 year old Bosch FFS!!!

Anyways, I need to get me some drunkeness..... lewd activity...... retail therapy would also be nice......

Watch this space

The on-going house-work

Oh my ..... it's a mess

Thought I'd show some typical examples of what our house looks like- from one VBM to another, or to make a VGM choke on her skinny-caramel-mochachino.... sorry for that!

Our kitchen- this is not an example of mess- it is ALWAYS like this.


Next- is the girls' shared room. As of an hour ago, they no longer share. TTB has upped the ante with all things 'terrible two', and as a result, Miss 4 has demanded she be removed!!!

It's PICTURE day today!

My Darling mother has just sent me a text saying how her and her toyboy [so henceforth I shall call her CM- Cougar Mother] just arrived in Paris.



Yes, as in Paris, France.....



I am shaking at the urge to go get drunk on that piece of information as I have never been so seething jealous in my life ..... so, I will just bore you all to tears instead with photos.



Tears being the word of the day today, cos TTB [now 21ish months- lost count] has begun 2 year old tantrum stage and I am not coping with it very well- it's MUCH worse than her older sister ever was.....



And! If I hear the word DIVORCE one more time I will slap myself [yes, myself]- it seems I am now at the age where all my peers are getting divorced- it seems I am not cool, and am yet to discover divorce!! [DON'T tempt me!!!!! *evil eyes*]

How appropriate that I added a pic of LSH first!


Next, my two little girls- my reason for being sane, yet not being sane- clear as mud huh?

ADs and how Aus mental health system sux dead dogs balls

For those of you who know- I am coming off ADs that I have been on for a few years...... Not coping that well, and have about as much support as a free-ballers testicles, so most days are a bit fat struggle.

Its sad that in these modern times, people are so caught up with their mindless yet busy lives that they can no longer 'be there' for others......

It also sux that I have to kill a child [or myself] before the MH system will kick in and go ' she needed help'- NO SHIT SHERLOCK! You keep failing mothers [well, and others, but an awful lot of mothers are suffering] and you never do anything to prevent tragedies [remember mother in Rivervale with 18 month old twins????]

Now, off to write to parliament to see if they give a rats, whats the name of our health minister? Its not stupid Julia- Gulia Gillard is it?

BTW- LSH is not very helpful either. He has turned into a grumpy old man, and doesn't seem to care one iota about anything I say/do/feel..... reminds me, I MUST do a post about the 7 year itch, or have I already done that?? Cos, I'm blurdy itchy right now!!!!

Au Revoir.... I need a coffee, and I wish I smoked right about now.... could do with one of them